There may be those who are actually born with the genes of intelligence, and there are those who are not, and this is a fact that we cannot deny, but the other side of the truth says that intelligence, like any other skill, increases and decreases, grows and dies, as studies have proven that intelligence, just as it is a trait that some are born with, it may also be an acquired trait that an individual may acquire through learning and training, so a new philosophy has emerged that says: "If you are not smart, become smart." Based on this philosophy, any parent can say to his son: "Don't say I am not good at math, but say I just need some effort," and then he must guide him to ways that will help him study math and develop his abilities to solve arithmetic problems.

Because the issue is purely a value-based one that is not only related to mathematics and mathematical intelligence, parents must adopt a special methodology to teach their children the value of diligence and perseverance, and to instill in them from a young age the love of achievement and hard work. This will certainly not be done by ordering, sticking, comparing, or sentences such as “Look at Ahmed, he is better than you,” but rather by the guidance of the Messenger, may God bless him and grant him peace, “with wisdom and good advice.” There are also several important points that the guardian must raise his child on so that he acquires the trait of diligence and perseverance. These points include the following:

1- Teach your child the philosophy of setting goals. It is very important for the child to learn that hours should not pass like clouds, that time is gold, and that every period of his life is an opportunity to achieve a certain accomplishment. When the child begins to understand this fact, the guardian must explain to his child what reasonable and possible goals are? On what basis do they set them? And how do he set an appropriate time frame for each goal he chooses?

It would be good if the guardian did some exercises to test his son’s ability in choosing the right goals and monitoring him from a distance. If the child feels close to one of his parents, he will depend on them and lose confidence in his abilities, while he will learn more if the parents monitor him from a distance. This will also strengthen the self-motivation to set goals and strive to achieve them.

After the child sets his general plan and determines his goals, the guardian or teacher must teach this child how to plan his time to achieve the goals he has set for himself. If the child says that his goal is "to get a good grade in mathematics or to improve his level in science", then the guardian should advise his son to allocate an hour to a quarter of an hour to study mathematics - depending on the difficulty of the subject for him - every four nights preceding the night of the test, with the goal on the last night being to study for two hours as a final preparation for the test. It remains to be emphasized that it is important for the child's goals to be reasonable and appropriate to his abilities, level and age, and for him to set his own goals in order to enhance his self-motivation. This does not negate the importance of the guardian's supervisory role. It would be nice if there was some kind of reward for the child when he achieves each goal, and it would be even more beautiful if the guardian taught his child how to reward himself.

2- Documentation is a requirement, and evaluation is an important measure, so teach your child that you should not be satisfied with what the child says about goals and repeats about ambitions, as words fly in the air and may not return to memory, so make sure that your son documents all the goals he sets for himself and writes them in his diary. It would be a motivating and encouraging idea if you put a wall board in your child's room or in the living room of the house and divide it according to the number of people in the house and have each person write their goals for this semester on this board, and make yourself a role model for your child by respecting your goals and being keen to achieve them. Make this board divided into two sections, for example, one for long-term goals and another section for short-term daily or weekly goals, and learn to point to each goal you achieve with a distinctive sign and set a specific reward for yourself if you achieve, for example, 85% of the daily goals, and another big prize if you achieve the long-term goal, and make sure that your son monitors that. Don't make things difficult and think about how to reward yourself daily. A small cup of ice cream may suffice if you achieve your short-term daily goals. As for long-term goals, the reward for them is supposed to differ according to the goal and its nature.

3- Find and provide appropriate incentives. Find out what motivates your child, and use that as part of motivating him to achieve his goals, such as promising him a bike if he implements 85% of the items in his general plan. It would be great if you taught your child, as we mentioned before, how to motivate himself as well as motivating him, and teach him not to always wait for motivation from others, and to always find reasons for his desire to succeed, work hard and challenge difficulties, as this incentive will lead him to achieve his goals successfully, no matter how the circumstances around him change and no matter how difficult his goals are.

4- Don't forget to praise, it's a winning currency. Support your child's efforts in striving to achieve his goals by complimenting and praising him, whether in his planning style or in the way he achieved these goals and his regular follow-up to the plan. Tell him: "He is very fast at typing because he has been practicing it since he was in the fourth grade. Or express your pride in him after he painted his room by himself." Positive encouragement from parents has a great impact on the child's personality, especially those who strive for perfection and fear making mistakes. We all undoubtedly remember how in our childhood we feared mistakes and aspired to achieve complete correctness in all matters and how this may burden our psyches and make us lose confidence in our abilities as children. Mistakes, as scientists say, represent a great burden on the child's psyche. Therefore, the role of the guardian is emphasized in maturing his child's vision by explaining to him that life tosses people in every direction, and that we must take it as it is, and resist, and that mistakes are acceptable, and that we should not fall into the same mistake and repeat it. On the other hand, praise and compliments from parents teach the child that there are those who stand behind him and support his efforts even if they are not crowned with success. Also, the critical approach is not always negative, but rather it can be used as one of the means of teaching the philosophy of success.

5- Give your son confidence and monitor him from a distance. Give your son the general outlines and then give him the freedom to act within those limits. Allow him to refer to you in some matters and consult you, rather than relying on you and making you the manager of his affairs. Even if the child is often hesitant and asks questions, he prefers to feel empowered to determine his own good and bad choices. Such empowerment undoubtedly contributes to the child’s maturity and gives him self-confidence and the ability to judge matters. So leave the matter in his hands and guide him gently and from a distance and remind him that hard work and commitment will help him achieve his goals. 

6- Do the best you can.  Guide your child to “do the best you can,” and ask him to do his best in doing his homework and completing the tasks assigned to him, but make sure that your approach is motivating rather than pressuring. After a few days, try to look for changes in your child’s level after he realized the need for hard work and effort, and draw his attention to them. This will enhance the value of hard work in him and motivate him to give more.

In short, the value of hard work is a very important value that must be instilled in children from an early age because of its great and direct impact on the child’s progress in all stages of his life. Children who do not realize the value of persistence, perseverance, and diligent work quickly stop at the first attempt and give themselves all kinds of justifications that doing that task is impossible and that failure has a hundred reasons and a thousand stories. So, guardian, if you ever hear your child say: “I can’t solve math problems because I was never good at this subject.” Try to send him suggestive messages like “If you’re not smart, get smart,” such as saying: “I know you can solve that problem if you keep trying.” “You won’t stop trying until you solve the problem, right? I admire your wonderful efforts.”

The instructions mentioned above are very easy and simple. They do not require a magical personality to implement them or a genius child to respond to them. Rather, they are easy and simple instructions that all parents can apply with their children and they will see the difference, God willing.